Small but powerful...tiny but capable of bringing an adult to
their knees...speechless but possessing the ability
to pierce an eardrum...the human infant. A baby is a
puzzle that arrives with no instructions. The moment that
infant is placed in your arms your life changes forever! There is no
turning back you are no longer the person you were just moments ago.
Squalling, red and wrinkled often resembling a
balding old man yet love fills your heart and soul and your entire world
shifts. It is no longer just about you; the birth of a child is not only
the beginning of a new life but the beginning of new journey, the journey into
parenthood. Your life is divided into two parts just like history; B.C
and A.C.: "Before Children" and "After Children".
My moment came on
September 11, 1983 the time is documented on a birth certificate filed in a
courthouse in Denton, Texas. My only recollection is of a a never ending
night under florescent lights; time held no meaning. One moment I
was in such intense pain that I thought I might die the next
a squirmy, slimy creature was placed in my arms and I was transformed
forever. Before that moment life was all about me. What I wanted,
what I thought, how I felt, my dreams, my goals but in the blink of an eye I became
a "Mom"; I was now responsible for making others matter.
It wasn't that I no longer mattered but the living breathing child that I
held in my arms depended on me and my husband for everything so she mattered
more.
I did not become a
Mom overnight but began the journey in the early morning hours of that
September morning. I am still on the journey and it is a journey that
continues until I leave this earth. The journey into Motherhood begins
quietly and takes you down roads you never envisioned you would travel.
There are potholes and detours and breathtaking experiences.
The moment that
tiny bundle is placed in your arms you are given the title of Mother, but how
do you earn the title of Mother. Is a person just naturally a good Mom?
Or is Motherhood made up of daily, weekly or even moment by moment
choices? If it is about choices what is the choice? I believe it is
to make others matter, a choice to put your child's needs before your own.
Why? Doesn't a Mom have a "right" to happiness? Yes
and yes! But by giving yourself to your children you will be transformed and
you will experience real joy.
I am a Mom of
seven children and yes I do know what causes that. My husband, David and I have been married
for over 30 years. When we first got married my husband told me he wanted
ten children. I would laugh and respond "Yeah you and five
wives!"
I wasn't the
little girl who spent hours poring through wedding magazines and planning the
names of my children. Children never factored into my plans; occasionally
I thought of what I might name a child but having children was not my life
goal. If anything I viewed motherhood as interfering with
"my plans", "my goals" and "my dreams".
I had no idea that
everything would pale in comparison to the world of
"motherhood" for me. I have never had a job that is more
difficult, challenging, exhausting: mentally, physically and spiritually.
Yet I have never had a more rewarding or fulfilling job than
Motherhood. There is no experience in my life that compares to watching
one of my children succeed in an endeavor or fail in an endeavor but
get back up and try again. I cannot count the hours of missed sleep rocking
a sick infant or toddler, nor the sleepless nights waiting for a teenager to
arrive home safely or the nights spent praying for one of my children to
find their way.
I have been
vomited on, peed on and used as a pillow. Used as a pillow does not sound
too bad until your child exceeds 70 pounds and launches himself into your lap
and bony knees and elbows gouge your ribs and stomach. I have had to
constantly remind my children that I am not a pillow or a couch but a live
human being. But despite all this the joy of Motherhood
is indescribable. My children bring life to my soul. They are
my masterpiece, my life's work.
The purpose of
this blog is to encourage Moms and those of you thinking about becoming a Mom.
My children range from 12 years old to 29 years old and there were days
that I needed to hear someone say there is a purpose in what you are doing.
So I will be that someone to you! I was a stay at home Mom who home schooled for almost 18 years until my husband was diagnosed with cancer when our
youngest son was six weeks old. I went from stay at home Mom to corporate
Mom overnight and for the past 12 years I have juggled raising children
with running a company that required extensive travel so I have been on
both sides of the fence: stay at home Mom and working Mom. So if you need some encouragement from someone who has been there done that and not only has a T-shirt but an entire wardrobe stay tuned for more blogs.
